Cartoons Hate Families

Did you know that CARTOONS HATE FAMILIES? It’s true, I guess. Otherwise they wouldn’t say in in all caps at christiansagainstcartoons.com. At first I thought it was a crazy over-the-top parody, but it seems to be the real thing. I, for one, would never have guessed that Monsters Inc. is an attempt by the Godless Disney organization to introduce Satanism to innocent children. But sure enough, it is!

This site apparently has not been updated in a year, so I’d hate to push up their numbers and encourage them to post more. Still, it’s an interesting find — in the same way that the life forms one discovers hiding under a rock make for “an interesting find”. It’s too late for me, but you may still be able to save yourself from these filthy, vile cartoons!

(Thanks Joe Dante and special thanks to Dewey McGuire)


  • Mark Morgan

    This is … wow … I just checked out the site and that’s bad. I mean really bad.

    I’m a hardcore, Christian fundamentalist. I read my Bible everyday. I’ve gone beyond that, studying Hebrew and Church History to get a wider breadth of knowledge concerning my faith. I’m well read in terms of the scriptures and the history surrounding them and I am a very devout Christian.

    And I’ve got to admit it, I get put out a lot by the stuff on Adult Swim. Honestly, I do. I wish adult didn’t have to mean sex and fart jokes. I wish it could mean intelligent, well thought dramas and sitcoms that challenged the viewer and perhaps gave them food for thought. Of course, there’s very little if anything like that on TV even in live action, so I can’t really blame animation for following that trend.

    That being said I feel … well, pretty embarrassed by all this.

    I don’t know who these people are, but I assure you as a devout Christian and a student of the Bible, animation will not send you to Hell. If anything, I like animations because it generally has more imagination in it than a lot of the live action stuff we get and as C.S. Lewis once said, “Imagination alludes to Heavenly Truth. We are God’s children after all and like him we feel the need to create.”

    That’s not a direct quote, I don’t have my source material with me, but I read that line a hundred times and that’s basically what he said.

  • Sam Filstrup

    I consider myself religious, and find this hilarious that such over zealous people have taken it to such a far extent. It begs the question if this site is merely a joke, though unfortunately some end up being blinded by their very religion. That leads me to believe that this site isn’t a joke. Who have taken their religion to a harmful extent. But because I’m studying to become an animator and enjoy as well as admire Monsters Inc., Spongebob, and Rocko I must be a satanist, right?

  • Bob

    I’m still not sure that site is supposed to be taken seriously.

  • Aleksandar Vujovic

    Wow, that’s a very interesting read. It’s hard to believe people who have “These guys love Jesus HARDER than anyone we know! METAL FOR JESUS.COM” as a link on their website can also spread such messages of hate. It’s ironic considering how ‘hard’ they love jesus.

    Man, i’ve been laughing at the writing on that site for the past 20 minutes and i’ve still got like 10 more minutes to go. Brilliant find Jerry.

  • Aleksandar Vujovic

    Haha, also, must note that that banner is absolutely excellent.
    Who is the comic genius?

  • AnthroCoon

    I’ve seen that site before and I’m pretty sure it’s a spoof. Similar to
    what a group called The People’s Cube does–conservatives who
    spoof liberalism by pretending to be Communist (“Communists For
    Kerry”; “life behind the irony curtain”). Spoof.

  • http://mymedicatedlife.blogspot.com/ Bitter Animator

    Yeah, I’m not convinced either. The pictures are hilarious. It has to be a joke, right?

    Right?

    A good find though. I wonder what they would have made of the “Lil’ Jesus” cartoon I saw pitched at the Cartoon Forum some years back (I don’t think that was the exact title but that was the general gist of it).

  • http://www.illegibleme.wordpress.com Andrew T. Smith

    “I don’t know who these people are, but I assure you as a devout Christian and a student of the Bible, animation will not send you to Hell.”

    Surely that has to be made the ‘Comment of the Moment’.

  • http://www.ulimeyer.com Uli Meyer

    Oh come on, this is clearly a piss-take. I know some of you guys over there take the whole Christianity thing a bit too serious for my taste (I’m not judging btw) but surely nobody can be this loopy. Someone is having a laugh.

  • http://www.cementimental.com Tim Drage

    At first I thought it was a crazy over-the-top parody
    What on earth made you change your mind?

  • Christopher Cook

    It’s like Tom Hanks said in “Punchline”:

    Don’t worry…we’re all God’s little animated cartoons.

  • eero

    This is obviously a joke. Just check some of the links, notably ‘god and gays’ which is actually a piss take on christian fundamentalism..

  • http://www.elliotelliotelliot.com Elliot Cowan

    Animation sent me to hell.
    Just ask any of my friends.

  • MonkeyFunk

    Yeah, us Toon Zoners decided on “parody”:
    http://forums.toonzone.net/showthread.php?t=211666

  • Justin Weaver

    HA! Nice! I actually thought the site was real for a minute or two, but could ANY self respecting HUMAN honestly take all that stuff seriously?

  • christian

    Love the picture of Celine Dion watching Monster Inc! hahahahha

  • http://asteriskpix.blogspot.com roconnor

    I hate Christians, cartoons and families -I don’t know who to side with!

  • Tom Pope

    Loves me some Brother Cletus.

  • http://anikey.blogspot.com/ Anikey

    Love the site, great piece of comedy ;)

  • http://www.abstruseart.com JPDJ

    The site’s one big gag. The “God and Gays” link, with its interview of Jesus Christ, is particularly funny.

    That’s right, JHC raises the roof.

  • Jason

    **Oh come on, this is clearly a piss-take. I know some of you guys over there take the whole Christianity thing a bit too serious for my taste (I’m not judging btw) but surely nobody can be this loopy. Someone is having a laugh.**

    Yeah, perhaps some people’s dour view of Christianity is blinding them to an obvious parody. ;)

  • Steve Gattuso

    While cartoons may not SEND you to Hell, I’ve seen more than a few that made me feel I was IN Hell.

  • Chuck R.

    It’s got to be a joke. The Bee Movie part is pretty funny.
    Hey, it just dawned on me. Where’s that O’Reilly guy?

  • http://[email protected] paburrows

    Thats definatly a spoof. Theres no way its serious. I love the very bottom. Theres an image of Jesus with his arms up with the caption: EVEN JESUS RAISES THE ROOF!!! Seriously… WHO’S COOLER THAN CHRIST???

  • http://pixeltoon.com Gina Kamentsky

    I’d agree about this being a spoof, the big tip off is the God and Gays interview with Jesus as mentioned previously by JPDJ. I’d turn my irony filter up a bit here!

  • vzk

    If you think that’s funny, you should check out this:

    http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0805/corpsebride.html

  • http://agoynamedjew.blogspot.com Anson J

    This reminds me a bit of the stuff for Bill Maher’s Religulous website. http://www.lionsgate.com/religulous

  • Hieronymous

    Its true though, christians DO hate cartoons. Thats why there were riots and the murder of innocent people over a cartoon by christians recently.

    …oh wait. That was muslims. Sorry.

  • http://www.jessica-plummer.com Jessica Plummer

    haha, I’m calling out Brendan Burch as the jokester for this website. It even mentioned several of his studios’ cartoons as blasphemous. funny articles on this tho!

  • Gerard de Souza

    Kah-mawn! This is a joke.
    This reminds me of the “star wars is evil” prank site. The kick these pranksters get are media attention and sometimes someone agrees with them.

  • Daniel Fouste

    “PJ Keane! Don’t you know cartoons are the work of the Devil? Now turn the Playboy Channel back on.” – Dysfunctional Family Circus caption

  • http://www.animationarchive.org Stephen Worth

    GULL UH BULL!

  • Private Eye

    Hello my fellow animation enthusiasts,

    Jessica Plummer is right. I’m just confirming it. The website is of course a spoof like most of you could tell. I just did a little Internet research, it only took me a few minutes. I ran a whois query on christiansagainstcartoons.com and this is what I came up with:

    Domain name: christiansagainstcartoons.com

    Registrant Contact:

    Brendan Burch ()

    Fax:
    1245 N Vine St
    #323
    Los Angeles, CA
    US

    Then I Googled Brendan Burch’s name (because I don’t know who he is) and found an interview on him at cold hard flash dot com. Link: (http://coldhardflash.com/2005/04/burch-unbuckled-part-1.html) As it turns out Brendan Burch runs an animation studio called Six Point Harness. So there you have it folks.

  • Ridgecity

    If Jesus was alive, he would ban churches paying for crappy religious cartoons to control the mind of kids, thus forcing them to watch South Park, the other kind of crap.

  • http://www.nicholastam.ca Nicholas Tam

    It’s more of an indictment of fundamentalism than it is of Jerry that a site like that makes us take a second look before we’re absolutely sure it’s a joke.

  • Autumn

    I’m clearly going to hell in a hand basket then…

    Worth it.

  • gepinniw

    it is a joke site!
    and well done, too!

  • http://wardomatic.blogspot.com Ward

    Check the WhoIs for this site and the name is: Brendan Burch. Umm, yeah, this is bogus. And quite funny, too.

  • http://www.scuzzbopper.blogspot.com Ken Priebe

    Everybody knows Jesus loved cartoons. When a crowd of people wanted to stone a woman for being sinful, Jesus stooped down and drew cartoons in the sand. Then everybody left. Maybe Christians don’t like cartoons. But Jesus sure does!

  • http://www.bishopanimation.com Floyd Bishop

    The site you guys posted is satire, but this is all too real: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JoVGMwcOjL4

  • Matthew K Sharp

    Be fair, though – it was the cartoons who started it by being deliberately provocative. Having a dinosaur as the very first cartoon star was just a slap in the face to all anti-evolution true Christian believers.

    Otto Messmer’s 1923 “Felix Gets Crucified” didn’t help matters either…

  • http://www.cannedgeek.com/ Kyle

    Hoax site is a hoax – its for laughs and entertainment only.

  • Dave

    You had it right the first time: “At first I thought it was a crazy over-the-top parody” .

    But if you really didn’t want people to click on the site and push up their numbers then why post it ?

  • http://dailygrail.com/blog/8389 red pill junkie

    Is Brendan Burch’s studio ‘Six Point Harness’ or ‘Six Six Six Point Harness’??? ;-)

  • http://ClaarToons.comwillappearsometimethisyear;Imtoobusyanimating! tony claar

    My dad used to say, “if you don’t have a sense of humor, I don’t KNOW you”. It is clearly a catastrophic “commuunication breakdown” (of bibilical proportions??) for these sad people to claim that “cartoons hate families”. What idiocy. First of all, cartoons are inanimate objects, although they are animated; ironic, no? They are not people AND they are incapable of feelings. Even children know this. Secondly, these “people of faith” have NO sense of humor!! What dullards. Lighten it up, folks!! I’m a Buddhist AND a cartoonist and I LOVE my family. It’s actually people WITHIN some families who hate each other! Anyway, the humorless are the ones who REALLY need “divine intervention”. God, tell a joke or SOMETHING!

  • Stephen

    The site is OBVIOUSLY a really sad hate filled spoof. So like Dave said, what possible purpose could it serve to bring this up in a post? Is the focus of the site Animation or Christian bashing?

  • http://www.driftingeddy.com Erik Griott

    lol, did you notice the cartoon jesus at the bottom of the page counting how many people have visited the site? if that aint hipocracy…

  • Paul N

    A scary notion: some fundamentalist stumbles onto that site and takes it for the real thing…

  • Mike Kozlowski

    …Sadly, my ex has several books that really DO tell you how bad animation (and Disney animation in particular) is for young Christians. One in particular – IIRC the book was called ’12 Things Witches Don’t Want Parents To Know’ – explains in excruciating detail how ‘The Little Mermaid’ is actually a thinly disguised attempt to recruit youngsters to worship the ancient Syrian god Dagon, also known as ‘the little fish’…

    Mike Kozlowski

  • http://winged-elf-girl.deviantart.com Lauren Rasmussen

    OH MY GOSH!!!!! animation is the work of the devil??!?!? then what am I, a good little Christian girl who’s never smoked or had sex, doing STUDYING how to CREATE this Godless filth??!?!?!?! I’M A SENIOR, I HAVEN’T GRADUATED YET!!! I CAN STILL DROP OUT WITHOUT HAVING THIS ABOMINATION PRINTED ON MY DIPLOMA!!!!!!!

    …good grief. like Bob said a bit ago, i’m still not entirely convinced that the site is really meant to be taken seriously, but… complete lack of imagination in visual design and navigation, links to other anti-everything Christian sites, no updates in a year… check, check, check. this could very well be the real deal. these kind of people embarrass and tick me off to no end.

    sigh. at least they’re good for a laugh.

  • Busta Rhymes

    THIS SITE IS FAKE. This is a joke website that the Six Point Harness animation studio made a few years ago. (Hence the Where My Dogs At and Aggronuts plugs). Looks like they stopped posting on it awhile ago. I’m surprised it took this long for it to pop up.

  • http://www.handdrawnnomadzone.blogspot.com Matt Williames

    This is very sad– scripture taken out of context and a very loud minority that seems to be considered the majority.

  • OM

    …Besides, kids: if God/Yahweh/Roddenberry hates cartoons, then imagine the tortures of the damned that Davey, Goliath and Jot are going through right at this very moment!

  • Rick

    It’s a parody, took 5 seconds to check the links.

    Though media does seem to hate families. Why is it the average kid in a fantasy story lost their mother or both parents? Not just Disney, but everything from Star Wars (poor Padme losing the will to live) to Harry Potter to Batman to Lemony Snicket to any Disney Princess?

    Yeah, you can talk about the Brothers Grimm influence on the classical stuff like Cinderella, but it doesn’t cover Mulan or Spiderwick Chronicles or… you get the idea.

    And even worse, how intellectually lazy is it to attack Christianity these days and think it’s oh so clever and funny? That’s as tiresome as the no-family trope.

  • Daniel J. Drazen

    I don’t know if the site is a fake or not, but the print counterparts over the years have been flat serious. Crackpot classics such as “Turmoil in the Toy Box” and “Saturday Morning Mind Control” have specialized in this stuff, claiming that “He-Man and Masters of the Universe” is blasphemy, “Dungeons and Dragons” is satanic, and the Care Bears are a stalking horse for the New Age movement. In short, they take cartoons more seriously than the people who made them.

  • http://www.mexfoodla.com Christian

    I’m figuring the site is fake but as a Christian (who only coincidentally happens to be named “Christian”) I was reminded too much of when I went to see Bolt recently and after a preview of Coraline the mother/7-yr. old daughter duo behind me said, “We’re not going to see that. That’s *inappropriate*,” in a very condescending, holier-than-thou sort of way. Kind of ruined the rest of the theatrical experience for me that day.

  • http://www.jeffallencomedy.com Corporate Comedian

    I imagine cartoonists hate it because they think their stuff is better and wish they had even a fraction of the success it does. It may in fact be that their stuff is better, in a way, but not quite as appealing to the short attention spans of today’s network television viewers, or have a formula that can be performed as endlessly as Family Guy’s digressions and pop-culture references.