lasseter-onion lasseter-onion

A Commentary by “John Lasseter”

John Lasseter

The funniest thing you’ll read today: a commentary by “John Lasseter”.

(Thanks, Pedro Nakama)

  • Angry Anim

    And I thought the Onion was all parody… this obviously is THE TRUTH.

  • !

  • (Sorry. I was laughing to hard to post more.)

  • moritz

    the onion rocks! :D

  • Actually, depressingly uncritical.

    The joke keeps undermining itself by being complicit to the idea that Pixar films are always creatively successful and richly resolved, which I think is arguable. So instead of the joke being “Pixar can do any old shit”, which is what I think they were going for, they instead just wind up at “John Lasseter is swearing, look.”

    Not their best.

    • Larry

      Tony, I think you missed the joke. While you want it to be a straightforward critique (“Pixar can do any old shit” is a POV that’s been expressed many times), they rather went for a nuanced, unique comedic take, which is what makes The Onion better than almost every other comedy site. WE’RE the punchline of the article, not Pixar. Sorry it didn’t fit into your preconceived notion of what you want to laugh at, or what you think of Pixar’s movies.

  • babaloo

    sadly some korean’s already did a heart warming movie about a talking poop

    • I’m a little ashamed to say that I own this. it’s cute. and it’s poo.

  • @babaloo, OMG!

  • Scarabim

    It hurts to laugh, because it’s so true.

  • Alf

    Oh, man. Lasseter is ripping off John K. now. Even in parody this is sad.

  • Although I laughed, and hard, the one thing missing from this parody is the embarrassing Miyazaki worship.

    • Funkybat

      The Onion writers probably assumed most American readers would have no idea who Hayao Miyazaki is. Also, I suspect an even larger percentage of the populace has no idea of how much Miyazaki’s films have influenced Pixar’s brain trust.

      • Chris Sobieniak

        Sad really, I wanted to read John rip into that too!

    • Heinz

      What do you mean by ’embarrassing Miyazaki worship’?

  • no, actually, I read several things funnier than that today…

    MAN, that phonebook cracks me up every time!

  • tedzey

    Prior to reading this, I actually thought John Lasseter wrote this!

  • Justin Delbert

    I feel like I’m reading the quote that the owner of the Cleveland Cavaliers said about Lebron James leaving all over again. This is hilarious.

  • cougar

    it’s funny because it’s true…

    oh and i think a lot of you are reading it wrong.

    fore example; @tony mines: the joke isn’t “…complicit to the idea that Pixar films are always creatively successful and richly resolved, which I think is arguable. So instead of the joke being “Pixar can do any old shit”, which is what I think they were going for, they instead just wind up at “John Lasseter is swearing, look.”.

    the joke is that the audience is too dumb to realize that pixar IS doing OLD shit. they’ve got themselves a tried and true hollywood formula, everyone thinks they’re geniuses, and they’re taking it to the bank.

    sheep in a herd, bro… sheep in a herd.

    • GersonK

      That’s not the joke either:

      “…that razor-sharp humor garbage we can basically barf out anytime we need a hefty payday”

      “We can put out any old piece of shit that perfectly examines universal themes of love and friendship and just walk away with record box-office numbers”

      These lines accept that what Pixar does is difficult and they do it well. Whether you agree with that or not, the main joke of the article comes from Lasseter treating the extraordinary as the mundane.

  • Clint

    Oh my God…that was hilarious! Just looking at the title, I knew this was gonna be funny. I don’t think I can look at Pixar the same way again. And that idea about a walking and talking piece of crap would better than what’s out there nowdays.

  • I guess if you can’t be as good as them you make fun of them :/

    • Ron

      Not as good? I’d argue that The Onion IS the Pixar of their field.

      • Actually it is very hard to judge. Their job is much different then Pixar’s. Based on this article it doesn’t seem that the Union is equivilant to Pixar. They are trying to get humor through the downsizing and insulting of another company. In essence they are shooting for the lowest common denominator.

        I just think that in general people make fun of a studio like Pixar in this manner because they are envious of their success. Maybe it is just my inability to understand this kind of “humor”.

      • NC

        Maybe it is just my inability to understand this kind of “humor”.

        Apparently it is.

      • Ron

        The “Union?”

        I’d suggest you dig into the Onion archives. Really there is no consistently finer satire being written in this country today. They have no more of an axe to grind against Pixar than any of their other big media, political and social targets.

        Jeeze, based on my Facebook, at least the guys inside Pixar can take a joke.

    • Was my face red.

      Yes, as an animation studio The Onion doesn’t come close to Pixar. That must really burn them up.

  • Toonio

    Well, everybody in charge of a creative project at Disney is responding to him so it’s not far from reality.

    From jungle river monkey to big studio kahuna.

  • andrew osmond

    Um, I read several dozen things today that were funnier. The Onion’s piece is on a level with an Aint-it-Cool-News talkback – U PIXAR FANBOYS R SUCH F*****G RETARDS. Heavens, how priceless.

    • i am just TOO COOL for this sort of juvenile humor *puts on shades and walks away from explosion*

      but yea, i disagree

  • 2011 Toddler

    And to think I would see THIS where a DreamWorks ad would be!

  • TsimoneTseTse

    I guess none of you grew up reading National Lampoon.


    We didn’t grow up either.

    • Andyman

      That’s exactly what this reminded me of – the golden age of National Lampoon.

  • d. harry

    they missed a golden opportunity to tie the talking poop in with the depends parties with disney execs.

  • Steven M.

    I know it’s a joke, but I can’t help but think this is what Lasseter really thinks.

  • I don’t mind jokes at Pixar’s expense, though I am of the belief that anyone who dislikes Pixar is not doing so on from a standpoint of genuine critique about the films, and more so just because they want to appear outside of the mainstream; or about myself, as an avid fan of Pixar’s particular brand of whimsical and at times heart-wrenching storytelling.

    I just don’t mind jokes that aren’t funny. And this falls into that category, and I think the only people really laughing are the aforementioned people who dislike Pixar just because everybody else likes them.

    Disliking Pixar is a bit like disliking The Beatles. You’re entitled to your opinion… but you’re wrong.

    • There are several Pixar films I especially dislike but it’s because I think they’re not very good, not because I’m trying to appear outside the mainstream (I’m not really a part of the mainstream in the first place).

      • I’d first like to correct my comment above, I meant I *do* mind jokes that aren’t funny! :)

        Elliot: I think that’s fine, a critical analysis of it on a film-by-film basis, you don’t have to like them all! I like them all for the most part but some more than others, but it’s probably a matter of taste – I happen to like the Pixar “sort” of film.

        But do you like The Beatles? :)

      • Ha.
        I don’t like any classic rock, really.
        It makes me feel constipated.
        See film by film analysis on the Facebook : )

    • i think it’s more making fun of the audience than pixar itself

  • Nothing new here, kids. This kind of thing was going on when I arrived at Disney in the fifties, and I’m willing to bet it was going on in the thirties and forties.

    The “big guys” deserve a jab every now and then. It keeps them real.

  • How is this funny? It’s coming from the satirical paper The Onion!!

    Now, if he had “actually” said these words… (*which he may be “thinking” them)

  • Tom

    Wasn’t sure what was up with this until I clicked on to the article. When I saw the Onion’s name pop up, I knew it was not a real news item.

  • swac

    Needs more CARS jokes.

  • Area Man Reads Onion Headline Only; Rest of Article Increasingly Unfunny Rehash of Same JOke

  • Dr. Ivo Robotnik

    John Lasseter has become Michael Bay. Now THAT’S the person you’d expect to say all that about his fanbase.

  • That was freakin hilarious. Way to go Onion. Great satire.

  • Jenny

    Sanford: What’s exactly wrong with Miyzaki?

  • jq

    Katzenberg commissioned this to influence the outcome of the academy awards. Yes it’s hilarious but some of those who would be voting will have this in the back of their minds – It is a joke but it is also partly true, hmmm. Let’s see how it turns out.

  • John

    This is perfect, I’ve been saying this for years!!!

  • I love The Onion but I don’t find this particular piece very funny. It’s not because I’m a Pixar fan who can’t take a joke—I just think this comes off less as satire and more as sophomoric jerkassery.

  • The part that cracked me up was the bit about the kids not flushing the toilet for years……..

    • philippe

      There’s “Archie le ¨petit excrément” from Adel Boughezala that largely predates the imagined Pixar fictinous project (and is similar to japanese caracters like ones found on a stick in Akira Toriyama DrSlump). It’s about a piece of shit but because it’s pink and it smiles…we love it. A great critic on our make-up culture. Enjoy.

  • Chris

    I don’t get it.. why is this funny..?
    …just a cheap excuse to kick someone more successful than you..?? Lame kinder-garden mentality.

  • John… YOU ROCK MEN!!!