The green M&M’s boots have been given the boot.

In one of the more entertaining episodes of corporate wokeness gone wrong, the 81-year-old M&M brand has reimagined its mascots for a more “inclusive” age. In practice, this means changes to the two female M&Ms’ shoes. The green one has swapped her go-go boots for sneakers and the brown one’s heels have been slightly shortened.

The whole political spectrum is united in anger. “These overtures at progressivism often comically fold back into the retrograde ideas they claim to eschew,” wrote John Paul Brammer of The Washington Post. “M&Ms will not be satisfied until every last cartoon character is deeply unappealing and totally androgynous,” raged Fox News’s Tucker Carlson. It’s unclear how much of Gen-Z even cares.

The rebrand is part of the M&M’s new “global commitment to creating a world where everyone feels they belong, and society is inclusive.” The brand, part of Mars, Incorporated, promises “to use the power of fun to include everyone, with a goal of increasing the sense of belonging for 10 million people around the world by 2025.”

The changes extend to the mascots’ personalities. Bossy Red will now be a bit nicer, while worried Orange “will acknowledge his anxiety.” The company gave a haunting explanation: “Orange is one of the most relatable characters with Gen-Z, which is also the most anxious generation.”

How all this is reflected in the brand’s cg spots remains to be seen. The mascots’ personalities have been developed across decades of animated ads, produced by high-profile studios including Blue Sky, Framestore, Will Vinton Studios, and Laika/house.

“Fun is not planned, it is found,” states M&M, announcing its new mission. Its arbitrary rebrand-by-committee suggests it thinks otherwise.

Some typical reactions on Twitter:

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